Being myself on birthday – 2015

Last month I was talking to one of my friend. She asked what are my plans for birthday? I said “Goa“. The moment I said Goa, memories of last year flashed in my mind. I was at Goa in last January and it was a real tough time. But this time it was different.

I kept the plan a secret. I also kept my birthday hidden on Facebook so that I don’t get unwanted notifications and messages. These days i feel, it is just a formality to wish someone on Facebook. Since I had kept birthday invisible, I got relieved from unwanted formal birthday wishes.

I planned to reach Palolem by evening of 2nd April. Spend birthday on beach and fly back to Mumbai on 4th April.

On 2nd April, I reached Palolem by 7:30 pm. It was dark by the time I arrived. Sound of waves and land breeze was a perfect welcome for me. I walked down towards Beach Huts where I had bookings done. The feeling of being at beach was awesome. I entered my hut and got amazed. It had a beautiful beach view. Right from my hut, I could see Monkey island and beautiful Palolem beach. The scene was very romantic. It is perfect place for lovebirds to have quality romantic time. I was alone and I could feel the romance in the air.

View from my hut
Panoramic view from my hut

I kept luggage in the room and started walking on the beach. I fell in love with sound of waves. Kinare song from Queen movie was on my playlist and I was having best time of my life. After spending relaxing time on beach, I was at a beach restaurant. They had arranged dinner tables on beach along with candle lights. I could see full moon with beautiful stars right in front of a candle at my table. I had ordered Goa’s special Prawns curry and rice.  There I had a visitor. A dog walked down towards me and sat next to my table. I think he did not want me to eat alone. He gave me a lovely company.

A dinner was followed by a long walk on beach. By the time it was 10:30 pm, I was tired. So I started reading a novel. It was novel by S Hussain Zaidi – My name is Abu Salem. By the time it was 11:30pm, I kept novel and phone aside and went for a walk on beach. Night was even more beautiful with those ariel firecrackers. There was a wedding ceremony at the other end of the beach. I considered it as someone was telling me that “Hey brother, look there! Sky is beautiful and it’s a special night”. I did not realise it was 12 am. I was looking right at the moon. He had a bright smiling face. I felt loved! The universe was sending me love. I never felt this much amazed in my life. After a peaceful walk, I went inside hut and found my phone ringing. That was Minu. Very sweetly she wished me happy birthday. And then Mom called. I felt so much loved. I wanted to hug her right then.After talking to her, I switched off my phone because I did not want to answer any unwanted call. And then I went gentle into that good night, waiting for beautiful sun to rise.

It was a special morning. I woke up at 5:30 in the morning. I got fresh and went for swimming. Sea was warm and pleasant. I dived in and kept breathing the fresh air. Sun was still hiding under easterly direction and I was eagerly waiting for him to rise and wish me on my birthday. The feeling was awesome. I could feel the joy in the air. The calmness of sea and silence of beautiful morning was making me feel special. By the time I finished swimming, sun was above horizon and showing off his orange color. I was continuously staring at sun. It was a great feeling. I never felt so much relaxed before. I closed my eyes and prayed.


After swimming, I decided to go for kayaking. It was early morning and sea was calm. It was best time to go for kayaking. I took a dry bag along, kept my goggle, mobile phone inside and headed towards sea. I started stroking with paddle and within no time, I was moving away from shore. I kept stroking hard as if I wanted to run away from everything. I never felt like stopping and looking back. I know if i look back, I will be worried about what has left behind. So I chose not to look back and kept stroking. After boating for half an hour, I was very far from land. I stopped stroking and let the boat settle. Loosened up my grip and stretched my legs and lied down on boat. I managed to balance myself. At that moment I was right inside sea and nobody was around. I had goggles on and i was looking at blue sky. My world never felt so calm before. I counted 100 to 0 (what i frequently do to get relaxed). After counting till number zero, I started stroking again and made a 180 degree turn to head towards coast.

As I started heading towards coast, I saw some black colored object right ahead of me. I did not care to observe. I kept stroking. And then again I saw that. I tried to focus. And it was a dolphin. I could not believe my eyes. Three number of dolphins were right 100 meters away from me and were crossing my path from right to left. I stopped and kept admiring them. I felt like those dolphins did not want me to be alone in sea and came to wish me on my birthday. I never felt so amazed before. I had special visitors.

Day at the beach
Day at the beach

I spent rest of the day relaxing on beach, reading a novel and enjoying beautiful view. A day was about to end and sun was heading towards west direction. It was a beautiful scene. Sun was turning into orangish and I was walking on the beach. I had headphones on and Bryan Adams on my playlist. I was observing people enjoying at the beach. Fishermen were getting ready with their boats, kids were building forts with sand, lovebirds were enjoying swimming, sun was setting down and I was walking without worries. It was a great feeling. I never felt alone. As the sun was setting down, I was observing how he was changing his color from golden to orange to red. He was waving me a good bye. I clicked him. He looked special. I kept looking at him and thanked for all happiness and strength.


After dinner, I was again at beach. It was dark. I was sitting on sand and observing the waves. I felt addicted. Though I was alone, I never felt alone. I was happy. I had inner peace. A perfect birthday was about to end. I looked at the moon and he was still smiling. It was midnight and I was King of my happy kingdom.

That day I realised that my world isn’t big. It is very tiny. It has space only for happiness. This journey started with #100HappyDays and here here I am. Stress-free, Happy and Dreaming.

6 thoughts on “Being myself on birthday – 2015

  1. Believe me or not.. this is one of your best blogs.. i feel happy to meet to you… those words just strike the perfect chord..thank you nims for sharing this experience.. aksharsha radat hote mi… khup chan….


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